Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous
by Validor
Summary: A vidfic to the tune of Good Charlotte. Minor 3x4 and bashing of rich snots. Relena dies!


"Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous" vidfic  
  
Guide: ( ) = what is going on in the video  
" " = Lyrics, which Duo sings  
(guitar chords (power chords!))  
(shot of Duo, Heero, Trowa, and Wufei in a garage (probably Hilde's). Wufei is at the drum set, dressed in a wife-beater and, um, non-descript pants. Trowa is playing lead guitar, and is wearing a tight purple shirt that says "Heavyarms" in sparkly red cursive on the chest. His jeans are tight, of course. Heero is wearing a black hooded sweatshirt and baggy jeans, and he is playing bass guitar. And now for Duo! Ah, Duo...He is wearing those gloves without fingertips (like Ash's, only cooler, because they are not Ash's and they are black leather), and the Endless Waltz pants!!! But with big black boots, and some kind of shirt...maybe...a black shirt half-buttoned, like Bruce Lee. Duo is also on guitar, buy mostly he is just molesting the microphone, because he is the lead singer)  
  
"Always see it on TV  
Or read it in the magazines  
Celebrities, they want sympathy"  
  
(Shot of Relena in her pink bedroom, sighing and jabbering about something, and Dorothy, wearing her sexy vampire dress, nodding understandingly)  
(Treize making a speech)  
(back to the band, playing instruments and such)  
  
"All they do is, um, cry and moan  
Inside the Rolling Stone"  
  
(Duo reading Rolling Stone with Dorothy in a rather Christina Aguilara-ish pose on the cover)  
  
"Talkin' about  
How hard life can be"  
  
(Quatre, in his office, surrounded by paperwork, a picture of his poor dead father on his desk. He stares at the ceiling in exhaustion and despair)  
(back to the band. Duo is practically eating the mic, and everyone else is playing instruments like, well, not like *their* lives depended on it, but like the fate of the colonies depended on it)  
  
"I'd like to see them spend a week  
Livin' life out on the streets"  
  
(Duke Dermail in an alley, wearing a ratty old coat, surrounded by garbage (isn't that *sad*?!))  
(Relena and Quatre on a corner, dressed like, um, Armitage and Sailor Moon, and looking scared. Duo, across the street, whistles at them)  
  
"I don't think they would survive"  
  
(shot of Heero laughing like a maniac)  
  
"If they could spend a day or two  
Walkin' in someone else's shoes"  
  
(close-up of Heero's horridly giant yellow sneakers. As the camera pulls back, we that the person wearing them is...Relena! Now wearing her Sanq Kingdom clothes.)  
  
"I think they'd stumble and they'd fall"  
  
(As he sings, Duo pushes Relena off her stupid old cliff, puts on an innocent look, and wanders away)  
  
"They would fall"  
  
(Relena falls to the jagged rocks below)  
(band scene!)  
  
"Lifestyles of the rich and famous"  
  
(camera backs away from band to reveal that Hilde's garage, where the boys are playing, is next to a mansion. Relena and Dorothy walk out, followed by an entourage of chauffeurs, servants, and paparazzi. They pose and such for the cameras, then try to get the cameras to go away, but they won't!)  
  
"They're always complainin'  
Always complainin'"  
  
(Quatre walks out of the mansion and shuts the door behind him. He walks over to the garage, peeks in, and smiles at Trowa. Trowa smiles back. Heero, Duo, and Wufei yell at him, but he is lost in love and ignores them)  
  
"If money is such a problem"  
  
(Treize in his shadowy room, contemplating his responsibilities)  
  
"Well, they got mansions  
Think we should rob them."  
  
(Wufei takes some money, gold, jewels, and such from Dekim Barton, and throws the loot to a crowd of poor people) ("Yay!" said Shippo)  
(New scene: Duo puts his arm around Heero conspiratorially)  
  
"Did you know if you were famous you could kill your wife  
And there's no such thing as 25 to life  
As long as you got the cash to pay for Cochran"  
  
(Duo nods at Heero, who contemplates this information, in case he is ever forced to marry Relena)  
(New scene: Duo working at McDonald's, getting yelled at by Manager from the circus, who is also apparently the Manager of McDonald's)  
  
"Did you know if you were caught and you were smokin' crack  
McDonald's didn't even wanna take you back"  
  
(Duo, wearing his band outfit and shades, sits in an office with his hands behind his head and his feet on the desk)  
  
"You could always just run for mayor of D.C."  
  
(Wufei talking to Heero)  
  
"I'd like to see them spend a week  
Livin' life out on the street"  
  
(Treize standing on a dirty street corner, looking dignified as usual. Milliardo tries to comb garbage out of his hair. Then we see Treize trying to buy rose bubble bath, but he has no money! He is stunned!)  
(Wufei shaking his head)  
  
"I don't think they would survive  
If they could spend a day or two  
Walkin' in someone else's shoes"  
  
(Duo, wearing those knee-boots that Oz people wear, and grinning as Une and Noin hang all over him)  
  
"I think they'd stumble and they'd fall  
They would"  
  
(Relena falling again!)  
  
  
"faaaaaaallllllll!  
Lifestyles"  
  
(shot of Quatre and Trowa kissing. It's an alternative lifestyle!)  
  
"of the rich and famous!  
They're always complainin',  
Always complainin'"  
  
(Relena frowning as Dorothy tells her she's the Queen of the World. Why is she mad?!)  
(band shot, minus Trowa and Quatre. Duo is forced to actually play his guitar)  
  
"If money is such a problem  
They got so many problems  
Think I could solve them"  
  
(As he sings that last line, Duo happily points a gun at Relena's head)  
(the band again for a while)  
  
"Lifestyles of the rich and famous  
We'll take the clothes, cash, cars, and homes,  
Just stop complainin' "  
  
(Wufei, in a red Corvette, backs out of a 50-car garage and runs over Treize's rose garden)  
  
"Lifestyles of the rich and famous"  
  
(Quatre and Trowa making out)  
  
"Lifestyles of the rich and famous"  
  
(Treize in his stupid outdoor Roman bubble bath)  
  
"Lifestyles of the rich and famous"  
  
(Heero, Duo, and Wufei's band on a giant stage, lots of smoke and lasers, a crowd cheering for them, in the crowd are Hilde, Catherine, Dorothy, Sally, Noin, Relena, and Une, all scantily clad)  
("Yay!" said Shippo.)   
  
The End  
  
Apologies to Link and Luigi, I couldn't help but use their Shippo quote. 


End file.
